Topanga Canyon

Thinking about embodiment

Up in the hills of Topanga

Anaïs Nin, Miranda July

Eating cold pasta for breakfast

Doing what I want

Drinking too much coffee

Hunter’s moon coming up before my eyes last night

I could go hiking but maybe I wont

It’s grey today and my fingers feel numb from all the caffeine

Been awake since 4.45 this morning

I feel happy

Beetroot dip and tortilla crisps

Thinking about the time I tried to get my grandmother to read Fear of Flying whilst she was dying of bowel cancer

And how I just wanted her to live, even through that,

and how she gave it back, unread, saying “she didn’t much feel like reading about a zipless fuck” – fair enough.